This isn’t a ‘poor me’ story or to gain your sympathy. My family and PF&HT sisters have lent sympathy and support. I have great friends and my experience isn’t wholly unique to this group. No, this story is about the capacity we have to heal, to put the pain behind us and open our hearts to love again. That ability amazes me. It’s why I write characters in their quest for love. No matter the pain of the past, our characters have to heal and trust again and open their hearts to the possibility of pain again in order to experience the wonder of love.

It’s no different for us, whether it be divorce, abuse, betrayal, death of a loved one or even a beloved pet. On February 18th, our furbaby of twelve loyal years succumbed to old age and left Hubby and me behind. Beau’s declining health was swift and left us a bit shell-shocked. We still miss him every day, but his passing left a hole in our lives. I thought it would be many months before I could face the possibility of another dog, but last weekend I saw a little female Cockalier pup and a tiny spot in my heart began to heal.

Have you experienced a similar heartache only to open yourself up to love again?

By Pam Asberry

Last night I sat in Miss Maggie’s cheerful kitchen, moaning as I nibbled on a hot buttered biscuit smeared with strawberry jam.

“How did I get stuck writing today’s PFHT blog post?” I sniffled. “I hate Valentine’s Day. I’m the only single gal in this crowd. What do I know about love?”

Leave it to Miss Maggie to set me straight.

I have been divorced for almost twelve years now, and it makes me crazy to think about how much of that time has been frittered away looking for the quintessential romantic love: all the awkward first dates; all the weeks, months and years I have spent in relationships there were destined to end in heartbreak and pain for everyone involved; all the Valentine’s Days I spent feeling sorry for myself because there was no special someone in my life to bring me candy, flowers and cards.

I have always been a sucker for the hype, for the grand gesture. But there’s romantic love and there’s just plain love, and it turns out I know a whole lot about that.

“If you constantly focus on what you don’t have, you will never be able to appreciate what you do have,” Miss Maggie chided. “Quit your whining take a look around. There is love in every direction you turn.”

It didn’t take me long to see that she was right. There’s my mama and daddy, my brother and his wife, my children and my pooch. There are piano students and writer friends and piano teacher friends and friends I’ve known such a long time I don’t even know where they came from.  There are Facebook friends and Twitter friends and blogger friends, people I’ve never even met who reach out to me with affirmation and affection on a regular basis.

“As a matter of fact,” Miss Maggie continued, “the best way to feel love is to give love. Lots of it. To yourself and to everyone around you. It’s not fattening like chocolate. It doesn’t fade like flowers. You don’t need a postage stamp to send it. And the more you give, the more you get back in return.”

So that’s how I’m celebrating this February fourteenth: by pouring all the love I have in my heart over everyone I hold dear. It’s a long list. I’ll be way too busy to feel sorry for myself.

Pam Asberry

Blog: http://pamasberry.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pamasberryfanpage
Twitter: http://twitter.com/pamasberry

Recently my husband and I were each in our home offices, but he had turned on the satellite music station to 50s & 60s music.  Since I was deep in thought and typing as fast as my fingers would allow, I guess I missed hearing the song, Sixteen Reasons Why I Love You.

Later that morning, my husband came downstairs to my office…nothing unusual about this, especially the nearer it gets to lunchtime.  But this time, he pulled over a chair and sat down near me…the usual sign that he is going to ask me to look up something on the computer that he wants to discuss.

But this morning was different.  He had a piece of paper in his hand and once he was seated, he spent a few moments just staring at the paper while I waited to see why he had interrupted me.

When his eyes finally connected with mine, his stare was momentarily intense, but then softened.  “Did you hear the song a little bit ago?”   “What song?”   What music?  What are you talking about?  Hurry up…before I lose my train of thought.  “Sixteen Reasons Why I Love You.”   Suddenly I felt a twinge of guilt for wanting him to hurry to his point so I could get back to what I had been doing.

Then he started to read from his paper.  It was a list of sixteen reasons why he loves me.  Okay, I’m a romantic, so my heart softened to the point of melting into a puddle as I listened to him read off some very lofty characteristics—things about me that mean “love” to him.  Gosh, by the time he got to number sixteen, I was choked up and unable to speak.  My arms around his neck and a tender kiss had to speak for me.

It’s a bit overwhelming to hear someone detail the reasons he has set you high on a pedestal.  The air is thin up there…and the seat is small…and you fear falling from the perch and disappointing the one who put you there.  Know what I mean?  As we move through our daily lives, taking care of business, I’d venture to say that we seldom think about the impact we have on those around us.  We don’t stop to think that the little things can mean so much to someone who loves us. Maybe it’s the way we smile or the way we pay attention when the other person is talking to us.  But just a word of caution…we must never forget that our tongues are powerful tools we can use to either praise or criticize…uplift or tear down…and once words spoken in anger are out there, it’s too late to yell for a “retake” or “do-over.”

You’ve heard the old saying about stopping to smell the roses…and I totally agree…but on a more personal note, I’d suggest that we also stop and think about what we can do for those we love…things that will demonstrate to them how much we care…and then take the time to write down what it is about that person that you love and share it with them.  Believe me, I can tell you from recent experience, it’ll mean a lot.

What has your special “other” done to make you smile…or make your heart melt?  What special little thing do you do to tell that special person that you care?  We’d all love to hear…and maybe it’ll give us some great ideas!!

Confession: We have stood in those lines MANY times over the course of many visits. This year I was glad my teenager was only interested in getting ONE autograph. She wanted the little ones to have their glory moments with the Princesses and Princes and creatures she’d come to know and love.

Disney is fun in that is focused on giving people a magical experience. And Disney rejuvenates its parks on a regular basis, keeping them new and fresh. I don’t think there is a single time when we’ve gone to WDW where we haven’t had one new thing to see or do.

Confession: Darling Hubby and I have been to WDW in Orlando 14 times. Crazy? I don’t think so. We know what to expect, and we love being treated like children in a magical place. We had lousy childhoods, so Disney’s magic gives us so much joy. And we always love seeing the parks from our daughter’s perspective. We’ve made many memories at the parks!

This year I had an interesting conversation with someone about the Disney Princesses. Snow White, Ariel (The Little Mermaid), Jasmine, and Aurora (Sleeping Beauty) were princesses before they found their heroes. Cinderella, Belle, and Tiana (The Princess and the Frog) were not princesses. They became princesses after they won their heroes’ hearts.

Confession: I know that there are some people who abhor the princess image—that a man can make you happy lalalalala…. But I don’t. I believe all the princesses to varying degrees had to grow as women before they could be with their princes. And in the later cases, I believe that Belle and Tiana are the best examples of feminine, strong women who demand their heroes to be their equals.

I love all the Disney princesses. I love Snow White’s grit, her willingness to learn to live in new circumstances despite the evil queen’s horrific plans for her. She had pluck. Sure she was naïve when she trusted the old hag, but that was true to her character. She had a giving heart. And Ariel is a winner, too. Yes, she should never have given up her voice, her one asset to get the man she loved—so people might think. But in doing so, she was forced to rely on her weaker assets to win over her man. And in the end, she defied the odds.

My favorite Disney princess is Belle. I relate to the quirky, beautiful girl who lives in a poor provincial town where no one understands her passions, her desire for more than the ordinary world she lives in. And she sacrifices herself for her father, and plunges into a world that is beyond what she ever expected or imagined. I always get emotional when I hear her sing the opening theme song. It’s my story. My life. I also love that she is strong enough to tame the Beast, to love him despite his flaws, and to fight for him. If anyone deserves an HEA, it’s her.

I recently watched The Princess and the Frog movie with my darling teenager. I fell in love with the main character, Tiana. She had grit, fire in her soul, and a determination to succeed in a world that wasn’t inclined to help her reach her goals at all. A modern day princess for modern girls. I loved how she was the strong one. She didn’t need a prince. And she certainly didn’t want a weak, self-absorbed prince! I love how she teaches her prince how to be a man. A real man who is worthy of her. She was a princess at heart long before she married her prince.

Confession: I enjoyed watching the little girls at the WDW parks this year with their princess makeovers, princess dresses, and their sparkles. I can’t tell you how many Tiana princesses were there, but they were in the majority. And the best part was that girls from all walks of life, all the colors of the rainbow, and all the different cultures in the world wore that dress. Tiana is a universal woman.

Do I really want to be a WDW Princess? Wear a tiara, stand around and hug kids all day, smile and wave even when my feet hurt? Heck no. But I do want to live my life with their attitude. I want to live with “smile in my heart.” I want to uplift other women and show them that with a strong will, a desire to overcome the odds, and an optimistic attitude one can achieve anything. One can become a princess in her own world.

So yes, I’m a wannabe Disney Princess. My favorite princess is Belle. Who is your favorite princess? Do you have any Disney stories you’d like to share with me?

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When I looked at our schedule and discovered I was to post TODAY – February 14 – my eyes popped out of my head. And I had made the schedule, LOL. I had unwittingly given myself Valentine’s Day. What was I thinking?

After all, Valentine’s Day is kind of intimidating for romance writer. We’ve really got to live up to the day’s reputation.

So in a rather uninspired moment, I decided to tell about the history of Valentine’s Day. I went to Wikipedia hoping to find a lovely romantic story that would make everyone sigh.

Instead, I discovered that the day was actually a commemoration of several martyrs named Valentine, two in particular who were killed in AD 197 and AD 269. Very honorable, but not very romantic. In fact, Wikipedia states: “No romantic elements are present in the original early medieval biographies of either of these martyrs.” That angle was added later for commercial purposes.

Bummer.

So what was I supposed to write for my blog post? Hearts and chocolates and romantic dinners seemed so old hat. I scratched my head for awhile and finally it dawned on me – why not use an excerpt of a First Kiss scene from one of my old manuscripts? Well, that wasn’t so easy to find either. I needed something sweet and really romantic, something “sighable,” and the stuff in my romantic suspense novels just didn’t fit the bill. I dug and dug, and at last found something I thought was suitable from a series I had dubbed “The Prasala Chronicles,” about a faraway land filled with alpha-princes and kings. I hope you agree.

So here it is for your reading pleasure. I hope it gives you a little Valentine’s Day thrill.

~~~

Darcy Matthews, a notorious flirt who’s never been in love, is an aspiring pop singer visiting the far-away country of Prasala. She has attracted the attention of the dark and mysterious King Leopold, who until now has been obsessed with work. After a successful audition, the King invites Darcy to dinner, then she suggests a stroll in a city park.

~~~

After a short ride in the royal limo, they arrived at an old stone gate at the park’s entrance. Leopold helped her out of the car, offered her his arm, and they made their way down a curving foot trail bordered by flowers, trees, and monuments.

Under the lamps and the moonlight, the place had a mystical, iridescent beauty. The smell of exotic blooms scented the air. A small river gurgled under a wooden bridge. A nightingale sang in the distance.

As they meandered down the path, the King explained that many of the various statutes had been dedicated to his ancestors. He described the history behind them, the beginnings of the House of de Chambonay, the founding of Pravoy as the country’s capital.

Soon they came to a deserted spot where artists painted the scenery at daytime. At its edge stood a stone staircase. Leopold took her arm and led her up the steps, stopping in front of a large, bronze sculpture of a man on horseback.

Darcy caught her breath at the image of a powerful conqueror with a threatening sword overhead, and his steed’s bronze forehooves pawing the air.

Leopold took her hands in his. “You were right, Darcy.”

She turned to him. His face was warm, inviting. “About what?”

“About the walk. I can’t remember when I’ve felt so refreshed.”

She smiled at the formal way he always expressed himself, but she was glad he was pleased. “I usually give pretty good advice.”

“I’m sure you do.” His eyes roamed over her face, taking her breath away. His look told her he didn’t have returning to his work on his mind tonight.

She nodded toward the statue. “Who’s this?”

“King Ignatius. Another one of my ancestors.”

“The former king was a good-looking man.” His eyes might be made of metal, but the intensity in them wasn’t lost on her. “I see the resemblance.”

Leopold’s lip turned up at her comment. For a long moment, he studied the image. “I hope my fate will be more peaceful than his,” he said wistfully.

“Oh? Was he a soldier? He seems pretty ferocious with that sword.”

He nodded. “King Ignatius is known as the Warrior King. Two hundred years ago, he put down a corrupt uprising in Chevalia.”

Chevalia? “The region my sister is Princess over now?”

“The very same place. The people were quite different then. All is calm now, thanks in part to some of the policies King Ignatius put in place then.”

“Really.” Darcy watched him studying the figure. This land wasn’t at all like back home. “How strange.”

“Strange?”

“The world you live in is so different from where I come from.”

He took both her hands in his, turned her toward him. “And yet, what I see inside you is far more noble, more regal than anything in my world.”

Surprise made her laugh. “What do you mean?”

His eyes grew as intense as the statue’s. “You are so carefree, so ethereal.”

As in heavenly? “Really?” No one had ever called her that before.

He nodded. “And your singing — it’s as though there’s a mystical power in your voice.”

This man knew how to flatter a woman. “Go on.”

His face suddenly filled with uncharacteristic emotion. Words tumbled out of him, heavy with his Prasalian accent. “When I heard you sing today, you made my heart soar. I felt as though I was transported to some celestial place. I longed to stay there. For a moment, I wanted never to return to my mundane existence.”

Her mouth opened. She was so stunned, she couldn’t even say thank you.

He pulled her close to him, slipped both arms around her. He pressed her close to him, his passion nearly bursting from his body. “Oh, Darcy. If only I could bask in your loveliness forever.”

She knew it was coming, but she was even more shocked when his lips touched hers. She’d expected him to be subtle, gentle, full of charm. Even a bit coy, like Philippe. Instead, there was the aggression of a lion.

He devoured her. The touch of his mouth sizzled like a streak of lightening blazing across the night sky. The electricity seared her senses. He drew her closer to him, his arms strong and powerful, the press of his lips firm and potent.

Beating madly, her heart flew up, somewhere around the statue’s head. What a rush! She’d kissed dozens of guys back home. Men from all social standings. But she’d never felt anything to match this. That power, that sheer strength of will that exuded from him. It was all Leopold. Tonight, he was the Warrior King. How else could he conquer her so quickly? So thoroughly? She felt like a besieged city, weak, helpless, ravaged.

And she wanted more.

~~~

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Photo credit: Victorian Valentine’s Day Card – Vintage Holiday Crafts